The Effects of Child Sexual Abuse – Keven’s Story

I love to tell stories, even when they are controversial, not just for the heck of it, but because I want to grab the reader’s attention in what I am trying to say, especially when the issues are very serious or dear to me. Child sexual abuse is one of them. Some people might say that this topic is not appropriate on this particular blog, but it is. 

Let me tell you why. A blog should be streamlined into one niche. I agree with that, but as a writer of books pertaining to child sexual abuse, I can incorporate my writing by showing other writers and business owners how they can use the written word to build on their platform, product, service or cause.

A book is a powerful way to reach the public, but so is a blog. It is a portal where people come to read what you write. Since child sexual abuse is so important to me and I have written books with stories told of what others have gone through, I think this is the perfect timing to start a dialogue so that others will know what I stand for and join me in giving this issue a voice.

The story of child abuse may begin in the child’s home by a parent, baby sitter, uncle, aunt, sister, brother, neighbor or visiting stranger. No matter who commits the abuse, the act is still wrong. If you are a mother or father and your child tells you that he/she was touched in the private area of their body, what would you do?

Keven’s Story

Keven was such a boy. He had been going to his local church for some time with his parents. Pastor Lange took a liking to the boy and considering that his mother was a single mom, he would pick up Keven from school for her and take him to the church or to his house until he was picked up. Keven loved Pastor Lange. He thought the pastor was fun to be around. That is all his mother would hear him talk about – how Pastor Lange took him fishing, to a fast food joint, to the basketball court or to the museum. So mom, of course, felt that he was in good hands and Keven felt safe until…

One night Keven was having a sleep over, which had been a request made by Pastor Lange to Keven’s mother.  She thought nothing of it because Pastor Lange was a man of God, trustworthy and never proved to want to do harm to her son. Keven and Pastor Lange did homework together that evening, ate dinner, watched some television and then Keven went to bed, his tired body yielding to asleep almost immediately.

Keven awakened to feel a large hand caressing his body as he slept on his stomach. The hand ran up and down as Keven pretended to sleep for fear of alerting the intruder. Without looking, he knew exactly who it was. The hand went to the waist of his pajamas and pulled it down gently, after which the underwear was removed. Keven was terrified at this point and didn't know what to do. He remained in the same posture and cringed as Pastor Lange penetrated his little body from behind. He felt the sharp pain and screamed, but they were both alone in the room and Pastor Lange, too filled with passion and emotion was transformed into a selfish man that Keven did not know.

It Can Be Anyone

There are more Kevens in the world and so are more parents like Keven’s mom who are trusting because someone holds an esteemed and respected title. It could have happened to anyone. There were no signs to report initially until the first incident. Keven chose not to tell his mother and kept his little secret because Pastor Lange told him that God would punish him if he spoke up. Keven believed him.

The Impact

A child who has become a victim of sexual abuse will surrender to prolonged episodes for various reasons. Sometimes, the child may think that they may have done something to deserve it. Most times, the child is afraid. The long term effect is even worse. Some will have difficulty in future relationships. Others will become promiscuous. Some women become prostitutes during their adult years.

Parents should pay attention to subtle signs such as:

·         Rare interest in things related to sex

·         Insomnia and nightmares

·         Depressed or withdrawn

·         Seductive behavior

·         Saying that their bodies are filthy

·         Complaining about issues with the genital area

·         Behavioral problems in school

·         Refusing to attend school

·         Becoming very secretive

·         Drawings or artwork of a sexual nature

·         Aggressive

·         Displaying suicidal behavior

·         Guilty feelings

What Do You Do?

As a parent, if your child confides in you that he/she has been molested, try to be calm and offer reassurance to the child that you will get to the bottom of it. Explain that whatever happened is not their fault.

Seek medical attention and therapy for the child. Go to the authorities to report it. However, make sure that before anything happens to your child; educate your child on these issues. Let the child know that even though he/she must be respectful to adults or authority, this does not mean that they should put up with being touched in private areas of the body – they should always tell.

Child abuse is traumatic for a young child. Overcoming this trauma is going to take partnership of the parents, professionals and the school system. Whether you are a parent or not, you should always be mindful of small children around you. If you see something suspicious happening with a child and adult, report it. Spread the word and shatter the silence of child sexual abuse. Don’t turn away. 

I did something about it by writing a book and telling a story like this. You can help me to get the word out by also purchasing my books title, “The Man in the Shadows: He Touched Me Where It Hurt” and “For The Wounded Soul” to support the work for more books like these to come. Thanks for reading and please leave your comments below! You have permission to use this article on your website or blog without making any changes.